The New 52!

I’ve never been much of a comic book guy. In fact, all of my knowledge of comic book characters comes from watching the many awesome cartoons from the 1990’s (well, everything from the DCAU is awesome, not much of the Marvel cartoons hold up), and a little bit of Wikipedia. But when DC announced earlier in the year that they were rebooting, I felt like it was my time to finally jump into comic book reading.

So a little bit of backstory for those who are unfamiliar, DC rebooted pretty much all of their comics and released 52 new #1 issues throughout the month of September. Starting on August 31 with Justice League, several titles were released each week, with the final #1 issues being released on September 28. I only picked up 14 of the 52 comics and decided I would post some thoughts on everything.

THIS WILL HAVE SPOILERS, DURR HERP DERP.

Random sidenote, it’s actually pretty amazing how cheap these things are. I’ve already dropped probably around $100 on just a few comics, what with back-issues and such. Most titles only cost either $2.99 or $3.99. Some of my other hobbies are much more expensive. So hooray?

Let’s start with “Flashpoint #5” which explains the reboot.

Flashpoint #5

So this is part 5 of some story involving the Flash (and others, in a big giant crossover) and I’m not going to track any of the other issues down but I did want to see the reasoning behind the reboot, in terms of storylines. Long story short, The Flash tries to prevent the murder of his mother but as a result ends up being responsible for I guess Negative Flash killing pretty much everyone in the DC Universe who isn’t either Flash, Flash’s mother, or a villain. So Flash pulls a Superman: The Movie and runs around the world in reverse so fast that he reverses time and resets pretty much everything. So while his mom is still dead, everyone else is still alive, but the clock has been set back to I guess like 2005 or 2006. Welp.

Justice League #1

Since this one was the first one out, I was kinda pumped for it, and boy did it disappoint. The basic premise is that Batman is fighting some robot/alien thing and has to get help from Green Lantern. The two track the robot to the sewer where it explodes and the two end up tracking down Superman, who promptly attacks both of them. Meanwhile, Cyborg is upset because his dad misses another football game. Yeah this is one of the reasons why they make Trade Paperbacks. Oh and apparently we don’t get part 2 until the middle of October, making it 7 weeks between issues 1 and 2. That’s swell, DC. This one sucked the big one.

Superman #1

Good lord this one. Long story short, some weird fire monster attacks Metropolis and Superman saves the day, and Clark Kent and Lois Lane are fighting. This one was ALL WORDS. Like most comics are mostly pictures. Not this one, too many people and too many words talking about ratings and trying to justifying putting reporters in harm’s way just to get the news. And half of the pictures are of either fire or explosions, giving me horrific flashbacks to the movie The Marine. I found it ironic that the secret message of this issue is that PRINT MEDIA ISN’T DEAD~!!! despite ads inside the issue trying to get people to order comics online and subscribe to digital comic services. This one was interesting to me as a Media Studies and Journalism major in college, with a print comic book trying to declare that print media isn’t dead, but other than that it stunk.

Batman #1

This one was really good. We start off with the typical Batman stuff, him talking about his parents’ murders, how he is the night, etc. and we see him fighting off some baddies, and then recuperating in the Batcave before another big Wayne party. Everyone is there, Bruce, Dick, Tim Drake and Damian Wayne, who I actually had no idea existed until a few weeks ago. The DC Animated Universe has yet to explore him, so don’t be mad at me for not knowing about him. But anyway, Bruce gets called away to help Detective Bullock deal with a murder, where an encrypted message is found in a cliffhanger. Great stuff and I’m definitely itching for more Batman. Luckily there are MOAR Bat-titles.

Batman and Robin #1

Another Batman book but it kinda poked fun at itself in a way, with Damian Wayne taking over the role of Robin and being basically a rebellious teen, not listening to Bruce during the action. And they poke fun at Batman remembering his parents’ death and always talking about how he is the night and all that stuff. The banter between the two is great, and is also the kind of stuff you would have expected from Obi-Wan and Anakin in the Star Wars prequel trilogy, but, you know. So anyway, Robin almost destroys Gotham due to his impatience, but the REAL failures are the thugs who failed to steal chemical rods for some weird robot dude that I guess is supposed to be R’as Al Ghul? I liked it, but the ending was weird.

Batman: The Dark Knight #1

Yet ANOTHER Batman book that starts off by Batman talking about how he is the night, his parents are dead, yadda yadda yadda. Bruce starts things off when he meets an attractive Bollywood actress at yet another Wayne fancy party but then gets called into action. He helps the GCPD fend off riots at Arkham Asylum when at the end a gigantic roided monster version of Two-Face declares his arrival as One-Face. Umm, okay then. I was pretty much Batmanned-out by the time this one came out, so it was pretty lame to me. If you like blood and gore though, this one is for you.

Nightwing #1

Here’s one I didn’t plan on snagging until I saw it, and it was just “meh.” Nightwing, aka Dick Grayson, is finally out from under Batman’s shadow, but his old life rears its ugly head again when the circus he performed in makes its return to Gotham for the first time since the Flying Graysons were murdered by Tony Zucco. So Dick finally stops by to say hey to his old colleagues after weeks of debate and is promptly attacked by an assassin for being an enemy to himself or something. Nothing was bad about this one, but nothing really stood out either. Can’t say I hated it though.

Teen Titans #1

I liked this one a lot too. Tim Drake, the former Robin, is watching a bunch of news reports on superhuman teenagers wreaking havoc all across the world when he’s suddenly attacked by some assassins from some huge corporation or something. He tracks down Wonder Girl (don’t call her Wonder Girl!) and they both join forces to blow up a helicopter. At the end we’re teased with the evil mega corporation creating and unleashing its most deadliest creation yet, THE SUPERBOY! Fun read with the Kid Flash part in the beginning being particularly hilarious.

The Flash #1

I was really looking forward to this one and I didn’t hate it like a lot of other people on the Internet did. It’s a paint-by-the-numbers Golden Age comic, where Flash runs really fast to change into his costume and attends fancy balls as Barry Allen. Ends kinda funky with Flash encountering other super speedy people. Kinda reminded me of Spider Island, which I’ll get to much later.

Aquaman #1

I wasn’t originally planning on picking this one up, mainly because it’s freaking Aquaman, but I heard good things about the writers and it actually turned out being one of my favorites of the New 52. Aquaman starts off by foiling a bank robbery in Boston, but everyone makes fun of him. So he goes to a seafood restaurant where he’s again teased and a hipster makes a bunch of references to blogs and YouTube. A depressed Aquaman decides to not return to Atlantis… but then some fishermen catch some weird ghouls that emerge from a deep Atlantic Ocean trench at the very beginning of the story. Good stuff, this one, and it was a really easy read that wasn’t afraid to poke fun at itself for being about Aquaman.

Green Lantern #1

Another mediocre story here, this time involving Sinestro being forced to be the guardian of Earth and Hal Jordan struggling with depression/bankruptcy and a whole other slew of problems that come with no longer having a lantern. Sinestro finds out his home planet is being enslaved and enlists Hal’s help and the story ends. Meh.

Wonder Woman #1

Yeesh, this one. Pretty much the worst of all the New 52s I read. It starts off with some dude killing a horse and another dude emerging from the horse’s carcass. The dude walks up to a house where some random chick lives and she apparently only wears a t-shirt and panties 24/7. They’re attacked by random ghouls and random dude sends random chick to Wonder Woman’s house, where Wonder Woman is naked. This thing seriously started off like a porno but they couldn’t even slip us any nudity. Strike one right there. So Wonder Woman puts clothes on after exposing herself to the strange panty wearing chick she had never met before then and her and panty wearing chick go back and fight off the ghouls and talk to the dying horse carcass dude where we learn panty wearing chick is apparently pregnant and that’s about it. If you thought my summary was confusing, TRY READING THE DAMN THING AND IMAGINE HOW I FELT. We’re never given any explanation as to who these people are, what their motivations are and why we should care. Use this one as toilet paper, because it deserves nothing better.

Action Comics #1

Yes, everyone can own a copy of Action Comics #1 now! TROLLOL! Sorry, been wanting to make that joke for a while. This one started off hot with Superman being a super dick, lawlz, and beating up baddies because they’re evil and it’s the right thing to do. Then it kind of slows down when he changes into Clark Kent and looks like Harry Potter and has to rescue Lois Lane and Jimmy Olsen from a speeding train with a bomb on it, which is an evil plan by Lex Luthor to catch Superman for the US Army. Like I said, this one started off hot and ended kind of dull. Plus, what’s up with Superman wearing a t-shirt tucked into jeans and a cape?

Detective Comics #1

That’s right, now YOU TOO can own a copy of Detective Comics #1! TROLLOL! Sorry, been wanting to make that joke for a while. Déjà vu buh? Anyway, this one was crazy filled with blood and gore, as Batman is tracking down The Joker, who manages to escape. While Batman is pondering what Joker’s plan could be, we see Joker in his hideout where a shadowy figure prepares to HOLY SHIT WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?!? Seriously, I won’t spoil the ending, but it’s shocking and makes you cringe. Full of blood and gore, and not recommended for children unless you want them to Columbine your local high school someday.

I still have one more #1 to read, Batgirl #1, but overall I enjoyed these new #1s. There was some really, really good stuff in here, but the rest was either “meh” or just plain terrible. But overall, it was a lot of fun and I’m looking forward to more comics and seeing how everything plays out.

I’ve already started this as a new hobby, so rest assured that I will return for more reviews. I’ll try and make it a weekly thing, because I’m also reading Marvel stuff like the new Spider-Island storyline in Amazing Spider-Man. That one… yikes.