Saturday, August 16, 2014

A Flubberless Fiesta

It has been a busy and deadly week in Hollywood, so let's just calm down for a second and check out Maria's ass thanks to the help of the NJPW cameramen.

Last week I asked you if you wanted the Deadpool movie to happen, and you answered no.

  • Box Office News: Another Michael Bay movie absolutely dominates and makes undeserving people lots of money. This is why we can't have nice things, guys.
  • Trailer Time: Check out new trailers for Mortdecai, The Prince and more!
  • In Theaters This Week: Let's Be Cops, The Expendables 3 and The Giver
  • Next Week's Notable DVD Releases: The Amazing Spider-Man 2 and The Quiet Ones

  • RIP Hollywood Icons
  • Jason Momoa has apparently been tapped to play Aquaman in Dawn of Justice. Aquaman is also getting his own film
  • SPEAKING OF Dawn of Justice, the ending has supposedly already been filmed (SPOILERS)
  • Meanwhile, some people think DC's plan to roll out lots of movies is a bad idea
  • The documentary film Blackfish, which focuses on SeaWorld's treatment of killer whales, really did hurt SeaWorld in the wallet
  • Bad Boys 3 is coming, as is Godzilla 2
  • Transformer5 will not be directed by Michael Bay
  • Marvel is planning an Inhumans movie. One movie they aren't planning, however, is a film based on Black Widow
  • The next Adam Sandler comedy classic has been pushed back from May 2015 to July 2015
  • Zoe Saldana just wants you to find her attractive
  • The Power Rangers reboot has a release date
  • Presenting the new Texas Chainsaw Massacre prequel: Leatherface
  • The redesigned Stormtrooper for the Star Wars Sequel Trilogy has been leaked. FUN STORY: The guy who leaked these images is an artist by the name of Tom Hodges, who went by the name of "Ray 'N Quiet Rob" on several Star Wars websites. He was commissioned to draw some crappy comics for around 2002 and got a big head because of it. In early 2004, he leaked a bunch of photos from Revenge of the Sith online and somehow escaped punishment from Lucasfilm. Some people just can't keep a secret!

    And that brings us to this week's poll.

    What is your favorite Robin Williams film?
    Good Morning Vietnam
    Dead Poets Society
    Mrs. Doubtfire
    Good Will Hunting
    Patch Adams

  • Friday, August 8, 2014


    Today sees the ruining of yet another popular franchise by either Michael Bay or M. Night Shyamalan, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles! I'm not a TMNT fan but I'll be sure to mourn with them.

    I did once own a VHS tape containing several episodes of the late 80's Turtles cartoon. I remember April being really curvy and wearing a really small jacket. Let's see if we can't Google what she looked like...

    Ah, there we go. Last week I asked you what the worst summer movie season has been over the last eight years, and you answered 2006.

  • Box Office News: ... is this news surprising to anyone?
  • Trailer Time: Check out new trailers for The Theory of Everything, The Guest and more!
  • In Theaters This Week: The Hundred Foot Journey, Into the Storm and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
  • Next Week's Notable DVD Releases: A Haunted House 2 and Muppets Most Wanted

  • Dawn of Justice has been pushed forward two months so as to not compete with Captain America 3
  • If Marvel held the rights to all of their properties, Guardians never gets made
  • Guardians of the Galaxy: making ancient things cool again
  • Prepare your body for nine DC movies in the next six years. We should find out some of these movies by the end of the month
  • The fifth Terminator has a title
  • You may now view all of the deleted scenes from The Amazing Spider-Man 2
  • Speaking of franchises ruined by feature films, a producer explains why the Avatar movie stunk so bad
  • How can you help get the Deadpool movie made?
  • Coming next summer: a reboot of Poltergeist
  • Coming 2016: a reboot of Babylon 5
  • Why is Aliens so darn confusing?
  • Internet piracy is not killing Hollywood
  • Look back at the most anticipated movies of 2013 and feel sad when the most anticipated movies wound up sucking

    And that brings us to this week's poll.

    Do you want the Deadpool movie to happen?

  • Saturday, August 2, 2014

    Cocky Little Freaks!

    With the release of the latest edition of the Marvel Cinematic Universe today, I thought I would pay tribute to the TRUE guardians. The team that guards the Lylat system, Star Fox!

    Last week I asked you if San Diego Comic Con is overrated, and you answered yes.

  • Box Office News: Glenn's pants are tight with news that a part-time wrestler doesn't win the box office. Or are his pants tight because of ScarJo?
  • Trailer Time: Check out new trailers for Spongebob 2: Sponge Out of Water, The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies, and more!
  • In Theaters This Week: Get On Up and Guardians of the Galaxy
  • Next Week's Notable DVD Releases: Divergent, Need for Speed and Oculus

  • RIP a man who starred in both Beverly Hills 90210 AND Die Hard
  • COMIC CON RECAP: In some of the bigger news from the convention, a movie based on The Last of Us is being planned, we got our first look at Gal Gadot as Wonder Woman, new footage of Ant Man and Age of Ultron were released, Bruce Timm is back, Godzilla '14 is getting a sequel with new monsters, and Guardians of the Galaxy 2 has already been announced
  • Hollywood is facing its worst summer since 2006
  • Test footage for a Deadpool movie was leaked earlier in the week; it has since been removed but if you dig around you can probably find it
  • Quentin Tarantino is rereleasing both Kill Bill movies next year
  • This week in really stupid rumors: WWE's Sheamus cast to play Darth Vader in Episode VII
  • The new film Boyhood is breaking records, probably because it defines life in the 21st century
  • Lots of celebrities died in Sharknado 2. Spoilers?
  • What's new to Netflix this month?
  • Oooooooooooooops

    And that brings us to this week's poll.

    What has been the worst summer of movies in recent years?
    2006 (Superman Returns, Pirates 2)
    2007 (Transformers, Spider-Man 3)
    2008 (Iron Man, The Dark Knight)
    2009 (The Hangover, Transformers 2)
    2010 (Toy Story 3, Inception)
    2011 (Harry Potter, Captain America)
    2012 (Avengers, The Dark Knight Rises)
    2013 (Man of Steel, Pacific Rim)
    2014 (Godzilla, Guardians of the Galaxy)

  • Friday, July 25, 2014

    Let's Get Comical!

    San Diego Comic Con is here! That means it's the time of year where we get lots of updates on sci-fi movies and other stuff coming to us over the next year. It's also the time where companies offer exclusive, limited production merchandise that can only be obtained at the show, like this exclusive LEGO 1960's Batmobile! If you're lucky enough to be at the show AND lucky enough to hold a winning raffle ticket, enjoy your purchase! If not, screw you, loyal customer!

    Last week I didn't ask you anything.

  • Box Office News: Hollywood is flinging crap at the walls, hoping something will stick and take down the Apes
  • Trailer Time: Check out new trailers for Hot Tub Time Machine 2, Fifty Shades of Grey and more!
  • In Theaters This Week: And So It Goes, Hercules and Lucy
  • Next Week's Notable DVD Releases: Noah and The Other Woman

  • RIP several people
  • It's a new photo of Batfleck
  • Hey, you! Donate to this Star Wars fund! And just ignore the new X-Wing in the background
  • Speaking of Star Wars, is this the plot? (SPOILERS?!?)
  • The Amazing Spider-Man 3 has been delayed until 2018. The Sinister Six movie and an Uncharted movie have also been given release dates
  • Meanwhile, a fifth Pirates of the Caribbean is coming
  • Reader beware, you're in for a scare!
  • The Marvel Universe will collide

  • Could Terminator 2 possibly have kicked off this latest trend of spoiling film plots during the trailers?

    And that brings us to this week's poll.

    Is San Diego Comic Con Overrated?

  • Saturday, July 19, 2014

    Friday Film Fiesta

    From the annals of "Stuff comes up combining with laziness," here is what I had previously wrote of this week's Fiesta!

    Last week I was going to ask you if you were a fan of the newer overpriced movie theaters, but the LiveJournal wouldn't format the code for some reason.

  • Box Office News: Moviegoers LOVE every ape, from Chimpan-A to Chimpan-Z
  • Trailer Time: Check out new trailers for Laggies, The Prince and more!
  • In Theaters This Week: Planes: Fire and Rescue, The Purge: Anarchy and Sex Tape
  • Next Week's Notable DVD Releases: Heaven is For Real, Sabotage, Transcendence and Tyler Perry's Single Moms Club

  • Entertainment Weekly has our first look at Avengers: Age of Ultron
  • Speaking of Marvel, the list of Guardians cameos has been confirmed (SPOILERS)
  • Ron Howard's next project will be about The Beatles' early days
  • The Universal Monsters are being rebooted with a new cinematic universe
  • The new Power Rangers movie will be written by the writers of X-Men: First Class
  • Speaking of writers, one of the guys behind the terrible new Spider-Man flicks is on his way out, and apparently the franchise is in jeopardy now?
  • The end is ever so near
  • Don't get your hopes up for a third Hellboy movie
  • Road House: So bad it's good

    No poll again this week. Enjoy your weekend!
  • Friday, July 11, 2014

    Hail to the Chimp

    Welcome to a Fiesta that's about to go bananas! Hopefully you won't see it as a big pile of poo thrown at a wall!

    Last week I asked you nothing, because I can.

  • Box Office News: Unfunny female Chris Farley, horror movies and E.T. ripoffs are no match for the power of KAPLOW MICHAEL BAY KABOOM
  • Trailer Time: Check out new trailers for Gone Girl, Unbroken and more!
  • In Theaters This Week: Dawn of the Planet of the Apes
  • Next Week's Notable DVD Releases: Rio 2

  • Good Guy Glenn returns to make sure you catch this critical piece of information before catching the new Apes movie this weekend

  • How does your review of the new Apes flick compare to the Onion's review?
  • Hot off the heels of the news that The Expendables 3 will be rated PG-13, Cinema Blend wants us to return to the days before 1984 and abolish the PG-13 rating. However, other people claim the answer is to abolish the MPAA rating system entirely
  • AMC theater chains will soon be adding comfy recliners. Having been to a local theater that does this, I can honestly say that the added leather and raising of the feet is NOT worth the extra money
  • A director's cut of Days of Future Past will add many deleted Anna Paquin scenes
  • Speaking of cuts, there is an alternate ending to Edge of Tomorrow (SPOILERS)
  • Further speaking of cuts, the unemployment rate is about to skyrocket. Thanks to YOU! If only you had gone to see How to Train Your Dragon 2
  • Last week I forgot to include the news that fan-favorite Community is getting a sixth season, and this week news came out that there might be a movie on its way as well
  • We are FINISHED with Harry Potter films. For sure. Maybe. Probably.
  • A Japanese animator does everything Pixar does not
  • Kevin Smith unveils the poster for his latest creation. Speaking of Kevin Smith, there will be no Clerks III. He consoles himself by visiting the Star Wars set
  • An unreleased Bill Murray film has been discovered
  • Observe and Report is actually a great movie
  • 10 Things in Every Tim Burton Movie
  • Hunting controversies are all the rage nowadays. But how do you feel about these controversial hunting photos?

    And that brings us to this week's poll.

    Do you like the super expensive theaters with recliners and real food?YesNoMy couch is better than any theater
  • Friday, July 4, 2014

    Friday 4th Fiesta

    Good morning. In less than an hour, bloggers from here will join others from around the world. And you will be launching the largest online discussion in the history of mankind. "Mankind." That word should have new meaning for all of us today. We can't be consumed by our petty differences any more. We will be united in our common interests. Perhaps it's fate that today is the Fourth of July, and you will once again be fighting for our freedom--not from tyranny, oppression, or persecution, but from boring conversations. We are fighting for our right to think. To exist. And should we win the day, the Fourth of July will no longer be known as an American holiday, but as the day the blog declared in one voice: We will not go quietly into the night! We will not vanish without a fight! We're going to live on! We're going to survive! Today we celebrate the 1996 film Independence Day!

    Last week I asked you if TV shows were better than movies now, and you answered Yes.

  • Box Office News: KABOOM! KABOOM KABOOM KAPLOW!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • Trailer Time: Check out new trailers for Horrible Bosses 2, Foxcatcher and more!
  • In Theaters This Week: Deliver Us From Evil, Earth to Echo and Tammy
  • Next Week's Notable DVD Releases: Bad Words and The Raid 2

    Glenn celebrates his freedom to submit links to interesting articles by, well, submitting links to interesting articles!
  • The TV theme song is dead. That's what you get for spending money on quality writers instead of quality musicians!
  • Chicago has won a bid to host the George Lucas Cultural Museum, which includes a Star Wars wing, and San Francisco is very cross. In completely unrelated news, I might need to crash on either Andy's or Jawas' couches five or six times a year.
  • And in a link that was sent in weeks ago and fell through the cracks, if you've been paying for Tarkovsky films over the last few years, you are a fool

  • RIP Several Hollywood Icons
  • July 1 saw the removal of many films from Netflix. But if you're really worried about being able to watch a Rocky marathon, just watch AMC every other week!
  • Despite the whole rape business, Bryan Singer will still direct the next X-Men flick
  • Viggo Mortensen hates the three Hobbit movies
  • Are sci-fi roles better for women? Zoe Saldana thinks so
  • Star Trek 3 will be more like the original series (Kinda Sorta Spoiler Alert)
  • A guy working on Guardians of the Galaxy no longer hates George Lucas for changing his movies
  • What exactly is Michael Bay-hem?
  • Fast 7 will be arriving faster than anticipated, and presumably more furious
  • More plans are revealed for Marvel Phase 3 (spoilers)

    And that brings us to this week's poll... nah, no poll this week. Go out and enjoy the long weekend, or regular weekend if you aren't in America.

    To celebrate America, here are three Canadians, and Australian, and a Brit celebrating America!

  • Friday, June 27, 2014

    Week 3 Without a Pic of Half Naked Chicks

    For some reason I want to buy a New Japan Lion Mark shirt and be a hipster wearing it around since I know nothing about puro. At least Andy would have something new to make fun of. Anyway, I was attempting to navigate the NJPW online store, which is in Japanese. They have some... odd merchandise, to say the least.

    Take for instance the official NJPW jorts! And Hello Kitty being eaten by the lion! And then there's this...

    Last week I asked what you thought of the announcement that Rian Johnson would be directing and writing Star Wars VIII and you answered yay.

  • Box Office News: When you Think Like a Man, you Too can achieve financial success
  • Trailer Time: Check out new trailers for Fury, The Prince and more!
  • In Theaters This Week: Transformers: Age of Extinction
  • Next Week's Notable DVD Releases: ... nothing?!?

  • RIP several people
  • North Korea wants to go to war with the United States again, this time because of Seth Rogen and James Franco
  • TV has surpassed film, according to Matthew McConaughey
  • Jope rejoices with the news that the Pacific Rim franchise is expanding. The rest of the world groans
  • Fox and Shane Black will team up to reboot the Predator franchise. Well, not exactly a reboot, more of a sequel
  • Where has t0mcruise been lately? Prepping for a major cameo in Star Wars Episode VII, of course!
  • It has been a quarter century of soilers (SOILERS for the now 25-year-old Michael Keaton/Tim Burton Batman!)
  • Entertainment Weekly has your first look at the new Mad Max
  • The rebooted Fantastic Four will be similar to a found footage movie
  • John Turturro is pushing for a Big Lebowski spinoff about The Jesus
  • Marvel is planning Phase Three already. They're also heavily influencing the new Star Wars
  • Another 007 movie delayed? Say it ain't so!
  • Shia LaBeouf gonna Shia LaBeouf
  • Stop ruining nostalgia!
  • They Live in Los Angeles!

    And that brings us to this week's poll.

    Are TV shows better than movies now?

  • Friday, June 20, 2014

    The Fiesta Hotline

    I have no ideas for gimmicks this week, so let's hear some words that rhyme with Fiesta!

    1. Siesta


    Ah, screw it, here's Cody Rhodes Stardust at Slamboree 1995.

    Last week I asked you what the best part of the World Cup was, and you answered nothing.

  • Box Office News: Suns Out Guns Out!
  • Trailer Time: Check out new trailers for The Expendables 3, About Alex, and more!
  • In Theaters This Week: Think Like a Man Too
  • Next Week's Notable DVD Releases: 300: Rise of an Empire and Winter's Tale

  • RIP Casey Kasem
  • Remember when I made a sprained ankle joke last week about Harrison Ford? Turns out it's actually a broken leg and he'll miss eight weeks of filming
  • X-Men: Apocalypse will take place in 1983, meaning that the X-Men can go to a theater and watch Return of the Jedi, National Lampoon's Vacation, A Christmas Story, or any of the other fine films released that year
  • Pee before you see Trans4mers, because it will run just under three hours
  • Brace yourselves, Age of Ultron soilers have leaked (giggle) (SPOILERS, no doubt). And why not, have some rumor/spoilers for Dawn of Justice too
  • Khal Drogo is Aquaman
  • Get pumped for the next Hunger Games with these propaganda posters
  • Coming soon to theaters: a reboot of The Outer Limits
  • Coming soon to Lifetime: Behind the scenes of Saved By the Bell
  • If you celebrate anniversaries, they will come
  • Ron Paul: Doctor. Libertarian. Actor
  • Did you know that Office Space put an end to flair?
  • Better Call Saul has already been renewed for a second season
  • Star Wars Episode VII has a writer and director

    And that brings us to this week's poll.

    Rian Johnson writing and directing Star Wars 8?

  • Friday, June 13, 2014

    Blame It on Rio

    Fast kicking, low scoring, and ties? You betcha! The World Cup is here, the one time every four years where we get to determine which is the greatest nation on Earth: Mexico or Portugal!

    All of our favorite stars will be in Rio, like Ariaga! And Ariaga II! Bariaga! Aruglia! And Pizzoza! And they'll all be signing autographs!

    Last week I asked you if the Wachowski Brothers were a one-hit-wonder, and you answered Ignore Andy and Post Boobs.

  • Box Office News: MEHdge of Tomorrow falls domestically to a teen love story about a Manly-Looking Woman and a Womanly-Looking Man
  • Trailer Time: Check out new trailers for Dumb and Dumber To, The Interview, and more!
  • In Theaters This Week: 22 Jump Street and How to Train Your Dragon 2
  • Next Week's Notable DVD Releases: The Grand Budapest Hotel and The LEGO Movie

    The Glennfather returns to ask if you can survive the death of the sun:
  • You'll be bahck... to watch Some Guy recreate the Los Angeles River chase from Terminator 2
  • The dinosaurs of Jurassic Park were so groundbreaking that they gave George Lucas the courage to create the Star Wars Prequel Trilogy. Take from that what you will
  • Your favorite movies have just been ruined. I'll have you know that Disneyworld spoiled the opening of Raiders first, thank you very much!

  • Marvel may have their movies planned out through the next decade, but DC is hot on their tails
  • Everything is okay with Ant-Man!
  • A Jurassic Park actor has been arrested for kidnapping and raping a 13 year old girl
  • A movie based on Sonic the Hedgehog is coming. Surely it can't be any worse than the Mario Bros. movie...
  • The film adaptation of Stephen King's The Stand will be 3 hours and R-Rated
  • Napoleon Dynamite is already 10 years old, GOSH!
  • Speaking of anniversaries, and with another chance to make a Simpsons reference, it's the 20th Anniversary of The Bus That Couldn't Slow Down
  • Neil deGrasse Tyson actually does enjoy movies
  • Even sprained ankles can occur in a galaxy far, far away
  • More photographs have arrived from the set of Jurassic World
  • Would you live in this pineapple?
  • Seeing a movie at Alamo Drafthouse? Not with your $1500 Google Glass

    And that brings us to this week's poll.

    What is the best part about the World Cup?
    Big Bootied Brazilians