Sunday, May 17, 2015

A Messed Up Schedule

Welcome to the Friday Film Fiesta... on a Sunday? Yes, thanks to Andy posting the WOTW a few days late, I figured I would be lazy and use that as an excuse to not post a Fiesta on time. Also I ate a pint of ice cream last night and feel sick. WELP.

  • Box Office News: The Avengers successfully fend off some new villains
  • Trailer Time: Check out new trailers for Eden and more!
  • In Theaters This Week: Mad Max: Fury Road and Pitch Perfect 2
  • Next Week's Notable DVD Releases: American Sniper, Hot Tub Time Machine 2, and Strange Magic

  • Apparently Hollywood likes to claim that successful movies are flops
  • It's Mad Max MANIA! The original is a pretty good movie, apparently; Various problems couldn't keep Fury Road from hitting theaters; and finally, make sure you see the new movie in 3D
  • Age of Ultron subtitles are confusing for Chinese
  • Get ready to see The Iron Giant in theaters again
  • In sequel news, we're getting a sequel to The Last Starfighter along with a sequel to 28 Days Later; we also have a name for the next Planet of the Apes
  • Starting in 2016, if you steal the Seinfeld method of scoring a date with a girl by claiming Daniel Craig is in a Star Wars movie, you wouldn't be wrong
  • Finally, we know why M. Night Shyamalan is on a losing streak
  • Product placement finds a way
  • Friday, May 8, 2015

    A Mother's Fiesta

    Welcome to the Fiesta! Mother's Day is Sunday, so get those cards and gifts ready!

    Last week I asked you if you would stop pirating movies just because Hollywood says to stop, and you TIED, saying you either will not stop, or that you don't pirate to begin with.

  • Box Office News: Age of Ultron BOMBS by failing to make as much as The Avengers did during its first weekend
  • Trailer Time: Check out new trailers for Vacation, San Andreas, and more!
  • In Theaters This Week: Hot Persuit
  • Next Week's Notable DVD Releases: Blackhat, Mortdecai, and Still Alice

  • The big news of the week is that Captain America: Civil War has begun production, with a new cast member
  • Meanwhile, X-Men will be losing a cast member
  • In sequel news, John Wick 2 is coming, as is a fifth Indiana Jones adventure
  • The next Avengers film will be shot entirely in IMAX
  • The second Star Wars Anthology film will be about the origin of Boba Fett
  • Former Fiesta Babes Kate Upton and Alexandra Daddario will finally meet on-screen
  • The Marvel/AMC 29 hour movie marathon is a crusher of souls

    No poll this week. Spend some time with your mothers or family! Or yourself.
  • Friday, May 1, 2015

    It's Gonna Bay May

    Come one, come all, to another edition of the Friday Film Fiesta, this time on May Day! And as you've probably seen a gazillion times on Facebook over the last three years, here's the picture of N'Sync era Justin Timberlake proclaiming that it is going to be May!

    Speaking of three years, can you believe that it has been three years since my failed heel turn at the release of the first Avengers movie? My how time flies. In that time span, we've seen poster after poster leave the blog, Jeditab becoming more of a selfish asshole, the end of Jopetoberfest, and Andy becoming a_happyguy? And probably some other unimportant stuff happen too.

    Last week I asked you if you liked the new look of The Joker, and you answered no.

  • Box Office News: Foreign box offices are confusing
  • Trailer Time: Check out new trailers for The Last Witch Hunter, Fifty Shades Darker, and more!
  • In Theaters This Week: The Avengers: Age of Ultron
  • Next Week's Notable DVD Releases: Fifty Shades of Grey and Selma

  • The death of movies will be brought upon by you. Yes, you!
  • Many theaters are boycotting Age of Ultron because of the high 3D prices. Also relevant: Don't see Age of Ultron in 3D
  • Hollywood has officially declared that movie piracy must end within 24 hours. Yeah good luck with that, guys
  • Adam Sandler's new movie gets more racist by the minute
  • Every high school in America will be given a copy of Selma
  • Indy horror movie Cube is the latest victim of Hollywood's reboot boner
  • In sequel news, we're getting a sequel to Super Troopers, a sequel to Kingsman, and multiple sequels and a crossover for the 21 Jump Street franchise
  • The second Star Wars spinoff loses its director
  • Hot off the heels of the Lord of the Rings and Marvel marathons, AMC theaters will be screening every Star Wars movie prior to The Force Awakens

    And that brings us to this week's poll.

    Will you stop pirating movies because Hollywood said to?YesNoI don't pirate anything
  • Friday, April 24, 2015

    We're Taking Over

    Welcome to the Fiesta, the LAST SURVIVING COLUMN of RSPWFA2. I think. I mean, we still have the Walk, just as a comment. And I just assume nobody sent WOTW votes in last week, since wrestling kinda sucks right now.

    Speaking of things in wrestling that suck, here's some generic chick that is giving "Japanese Wrestling Purists" aneurysms for being Kelly Kelly 2 (meaning she's a perfect fit for the Fiesta!)

    Last week I asked you which new trailer excited you the most, and you answered Star Wars.

  • Box Office News: The world simply isn't ready for the genius of Kevin James
  • Check out new trailers for Jurassic World, The Visit, and more!
  • In Theaters This Week: The Age of Adaline, Little Boy, and The Water Diviner
  • Next Week's Notable DVD Releases: The Boy Next Door, Inherent Vice,and The Wedding Ringer

  • News from Star Wars: Celebration over the weekend reveals that the Star Wars spinoff films will be called "Anthologies," and the first one will cover the theft of the plans of the Death Star
  • Add "racist" to the list of negative things about Adam Sandler movies
  • A release date has been set for Pacific Rim 2
  • You've probably heard this before, but the story of Marvel's financial turnaround thanks to movies is still really cool
  • In Star Trek news, the new villain will apparently be a badass
  • Spider-Man will return... in animated form
  • Age of Ultron is already outdated
  • What is Christopher Nolan's favorite moment from all of his films?
  • LATE BREAKING NEWS: First image of the new Joker

    And that brings us to this week's poll.

    Do you like the new Joker look?YesNoMeh
  • Sunday, April 19, 2015

    Sunday Selfie Siesta

    Welcome to the Fiesta! Late again, yes I know.

    And it's actually out of my control this time, as we had some nasty thunderstorms come through the area on Friday and Saturday, and when the power wasn't knocked out, the Internet was. So thank Mother Nature or AT&T for the delays.

    Here are some Sunday Selfies as my apology to you.

    Last week I asked if you liked the new look of The Thing in the new Fantastic Four movie, and you answered MEHntastic Four.

  • Box Office News: I mean, given the choices of what's in theaters now, why would you NOT be seeing Furious 7 at this point?
  • Trailer Time: Check out new trailers for Star Wars: The Force Awakens, Batman vs. Superman: Dawn of Justice, and more!
  • In Theaters This Week: Child 44, Monkey Kingdom, Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2, and Unfriended
  • Next Week's Notable DVD Releases: Cake and Taken 3

  • Wonder Woman loses its director because of reasons. So they went out and got a new one
  • The production crew for John Wick had to spend $5000 to create CGI dog poop
  • Josh Hartnett has some big regrets
  • If Stella can get her groove back, so can Vin Diesel
  • More communication problems for Sony?
  • Steven Spielberg will soon be directing his first Disney film
  • Matthew Vaughn could be directing the Flash Gordon reboot
  • Blame Alan Rickman if you hate when changes are made to terrible scripts
  • In casting news, Olivia Munn is an X-Man, and The Gos could be coming to the world of Blade Runner

    And that brings us to this week's poll.

    WHich new trailer this week was better?
    Star Wars
    Batman vs Superman

  • Friday, April 10, 2015


    Welcome to the Fiesta!

    Yes, I COULD have written a column last week, but I was mentally tapped out after the difficulty of writing this year's WELPie Awards. Those three segments were challenging to write! April Fools? Here's what your face should have looked like last week when there was no Fiesta.

    Two weeks ago I asked you if you would ever attend South by Southwest, and you answered only to visit Jeditab. Daawwwwwwwwww.

  • Box Office News: Furious 7 speeds its way to the record books
  • Trailer Time: Check out new trailers for Scream Queens, Aloft, and more!
  • In Theaters This Week: The Longest Ride
  • Next Week's Notable DVD Releases: The Woman In Black 2: Angel of Death

  • RIP Geoffrey Lewis and James Best
  • Furious 7 is dominating the box office, but its sequel is nowhere near ready
  • Speaking of Furious 7, 75 percent of its audience has been non-white
  • Brad Bird reveals that he is writing a script for The Incredibles 2
  • Bad news for Australians that download movies. Somebody check on TokenAussie!
  • Get your first look at Yellowjacket from Ant Man and The Thing from Fantastic Four
  • One franchise that will have zero sequels any time soon is Girl With The Dragon Tattoo
  • "James Bond should not be black"
  • Here are nine movies that could have happened, but didn't
  • Attending Star Wars: Celebration? You'll get to see the new trailer for Episode VII before the rest of us

  • And that brings us to this week's poll.

    Do you like the new look of The Thing?
    MEHntastic Four

  • Saturday, March 28, 2015

    The 2015 WELPie Awards

    Available in three different countries

    In one single language

    Over a half-gross hits each week!


    For over half a decade, the revolutionary force in blogging entertainment.

    Friday, March 20, 2015


    Welcome to the Fiesta!

    It's South by Southwest week here in Austin, meaning the streets are flooded with bros in XXXL tanktops, and chicks in muscle shirts and sports bras trying to get free beer and waiting in line for hours to try to get a whiff of a chair that Beyonce might have farted in in 2003.

    But enough about my personal life, here's Bizarro DX from some wrestling video that was released this week.

    Last week I asked you why a Cinderella movie was being released in 2015, and you answered who cares?

  • Box Office News: A remake takes the top spot in the era of remakes.
  • Trailer Time: Check out new trailers for Good Kill, Pixels, and more!
  • In Theaters This Week: The Divergent Series: Insurgent and The Gunman
  • Next Week's Notable DVD Releases: The Hobbit: Battle of the Five Armies and Into the Woods

  • If you're like me, you use Tinder, and if you're also like me, you match with spambots on Tinder. And this week we learned that viral marketing has no shame
  • Why are we getting Mallrats 2? To please Kevin Smith
  • It's the end of an era
  • It's also the end of another era
  • Coming soon to theaters: Fraggle Rock
  • Coming to Netflix in April: Leprechaun! Leaving Netflix in April: some really good stuff

    And that brings us to this week's poll.

    Will you ever attend South by Southwest?
    Only to visit Jeditab
    What is SXSW?

  • Friday, March 13, 2015

    And Today Is His Birthday

    Welcome to another edition of the Friday Film Fiesta, this time taking place on Friday the 13th! Again!

    I've been lazy the last few weeks and haven't asked you anything.

  • Box Office News: All of the latest releases are huge flops. Is the era of Vince Vaughn over as we head into the year 2006?
  • Trailer Time: Check out new trailers for Hotel Transylvania 2, Adult Beginners, and more!
  • In Theaters This Week: Cinderella and Run All Night
  • Next Week's Notable DVD Releases: Annie, Exodus: Gods and Kings, Penguins of Madagascar, and Vice

  • Our big news of the week is that the first Star Wars spinoff will be about Rogue Squadron, while Episode VIII will resume the franchise's traditional May release date
  • The above news is sending shockwaves through Hollywood, as a sequel for a film that has yet to be released has already been pushed back
  • One thing you will not be seeing in the new Star Wars movies: smoking
  • SEQUELMANIA: Frozen 2, Clerks III, Mallrats 2, Sharknado 3
  • Genndy Tartakovsky's Popeye will not be seeing the light of day
  • Liam Neeson is quitting action movies
  • The cast of Monty Python and the Holy Grail is reuniting for the movie's 40th anniversary
  • In boycotting Netflix movies, theaters are making themselves irrelevant
  • Also becoming irrelevant: Sony, for trying to turn Ghostbusters into a franchise
  • Christopher Nolan is stepping up his efforts to preserve film

    And that brings us to this week's poll.

    Why is there a live action Cinderella movie coming out in 2015?
    Who cares?

  • Friday, March 6, 2015

    Friday Film Fiesta!

    Welcome to the Fiesta!

    Last week I asked you nothing.

  • Box Office News: Will Smith proves that combining him with a young, white woman is money
  • Trailer Time: Check out new trailers for Avengers: Age of Ultron, The Forger, and more!
  • In Theaters This Week: Chappie, The Second Best Exotic Marigold Hotel, and Unfinished Business
  • Next Week's Notable DVD Releases: Annie and Night at the Museum: Secret of the Tomb

  • RIP Daniel von Bargen and Harve Bennett
  • Harrison Ford crashed a plane onto a golf course this week, and luckily is okay. Hey, he said it himself in The Last Crusade, he can fly a plane, but he can't land one!
  • We have some casting confirmations for Independence Day 2
  • Toy Story 4 will not exactly be a sequel
  • The stars of the latest Vince Vaughn flop have posed in generic office stock photos, which you can use for projects if you choose
  • Edward Norton is fed up with you
  • Youth-based films peaked in 1985
  • Fifty Shades apparently featured CGI pubic hair

    No poll again this week. Enjoy your weekend!